Here they are, well 6 of them. One of them was way to pathetic to post. Keep in mind that the client was super specific in their instructions and left zero room for artistic license.
What appears below is exactly what they asked for.
Wednesday, June 19, 2013
Just got caught up on a deadline and I'm feeling pretty good about that.
However I'm feeling bad that I missed church. It's my fault that I didn't get the work done earlier. I missed a blessing tonight because I procrastinate. I saw a picture Cinnamon posted of a song that the Worship Band did tonight and I am genuinely sad I missed it.
I have an overwhelming guilt since Feb if I miss a church service. I want to be a hard worker in the church, a constant reliable face then I miss a Wednesday & just feel awful.
I got the assignment that i was working on today on Monday and I knew my Deadline was coming but I worked on other stuff. I just kept thinking the same thing "I'll start it in a little bit".
Still things came up and I goofed off.
If I had to pick my biggest Issue. I'd have to say that it is "tomorrow".
Tomorrow, ill make it to the gym. Tomorrow ill start a devotional. Tomorrow i'll cut out sugar. Tomorrow I'll only drink water. Tomorrow ill start that assignment. Tomorrow I'll clean. Tomorrow I'll do laundry.
It's not just stuff I need to do its stuff I want to do. Tomorrow I'll get back to my xbox game of Tomb Raider. Tomorrow I'll read those magazines I've saved. Tomorrow I'll sketch. I have 5-6 movies I've downloaded that I haven't watched because when I download them I think I'll watch them that night. Then I get done with art for the day and I just spend time checking social media and catching up on DVR'd stuff that then its too late to start a movie. So I think, I'll watch that tomorrow.
The thing is that I 100% believe it when I think it.
It's usually when I am about to turn in for the night. I get up, turn the tv off and realize all the things I didn't get done.
I run a list in my head and think, "Crap! I'll get to it tomorrow".
Then I lay down & I go to read (usually a digital graphic novel). Thing is when I go to read one I pass my Bible app. Then you guessed it, I think to myself, I'll start that Bible reading program tomorrow. .
It is compounded when things happen like today where I miss something I want to do because I've let it go too close to a deadline.
I have no idea how to change this. It's driving me nuts.
Thanks for reading.
Saturday, June 15, 2013
I make no secret of the fact that I've been diagnosed with OCD & Social Anxiety Disorder. If I stay on my meds then its managed decently.
Sounds ridiculous but I just identified a tick tonight that for some reason I never classified before.
I almost constantly am holding my phone. I check social media, email, weather, surf the web occasionally write blogs, draw and read all from my phone. I use a ton of features. The only feature I wish it didn't have would be the ability to receive calls.
I get really nervous when I get a phone call. Even if its someone I know. If its someone I don't know then I won't answer at all.
I used to let it go to voicemail if I didn't know the number. Then I'd just stare at the message and be too worried or nervous to listen to it. I'd delete it without listening because I was too worried it was bad news.
Eventually I disconnected the voicemail feature. Which is something I continue to this day. It's been at least 3 years since I have been able to receive a voice mail.
I'm a freelance artist and occasionally I have to bite the bullet and talk to a client. If at all possible I avoid it.
If its a big client and the ask to talk to me I will of course but it makes me wicked nervous. Often times dizzy or sick to my stomach. I've never lost a corporate client due to not talking on the phone. Most of them prefer it this way.
If its a local job or someone contacts me on Facebook, twitter or my website then one of the first things I tell them is that I don't talk on the phone.
I let them know that it's due to the fact it's easier to have that paper to look at for reference when I'm working on a job.
It's black and white that way.
Honestly it's saved my bacon more than once. A client asked me to do a job for the Army, Navy and Marines. I did the work and when I turned them in I was told I wasted my time on 3 designs. They wanted the Air Force not the Navy.
I referred to the email where the client had accidentally typed Navy and I got paid for my work plus got to do 3 Air Force designs for extra money.
If I'd talked on the phone then I'd have no way to prove they were wrong.
That and a couple stories like it has just solidified my will on not talking to clients.
Texting is a little better. There have been a few times I have deleted a text before reading it cuz I was nervous about what it said.
Its not easy but it can be done. You just have to kinda blur your vision so all you can see are the screen colors. Then swipe and delete.
It's just one of those things I've learned to live with.
It just came up recently and got me thinking about it. I guess I didn't tie it to my condition until tonight when I started piecing together the progression.
I used to talk on the phone like a teenage girl when I was a kid. Now I only call if its 100% the last option.
Wonder if eventually I'll end up just getting rid of the phone all together. Can't see that happening for a long long time though if ever.
Ok, just kinda a late night rant.
Thanks for reading.
Monday, June 10, 2013
This blog has been a while coming. It’s been gestating since March. However due to work load and general malaise on my end I hadn’t got around to doing all my research.
Why to attend church.
Why to attend church is easy, pretty much remedial if you have been raised in church(s).
The best reason is again found in Hebrews ch10 vs 25 “not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another--and all the more as you see the Day approaching.”
The Bible tells us to go to a church, to assemble to help each other and ourselves in our faith.
It’s super easy to not go to church. You are tired, you are busy, you went last week or you just don’t want to. You are only home for a limited time and you have “better stuff to do”
I lived a life of looking for reasons not to attend for a long time. From the end of church on Sunday til Sunday morning before leaving for church I was searching for a reason to no go.
Sometimes for me its because I know what my life is like and what a sinner I am. I felt if i went to church I was just another hypocrite.
I thought I’d be judged by the people at the church, I could feel their eyes on me. I found ways to not go.
Then there are the people who miss because they are “good people” and don’t need to be there every Sunday. Y’know the really sunny and warm Sundays.
If you are not at a church you are missing something. You aren’ going to lose your salvation necessarily but you are going to miss something.
It’s like when you come home from a long day of work or just goofing off and you see that tag on your door that says you just missed a delivery.
You didn’t get that package because you weren't there when it was dropped off.
Thats how Sundays are, sometimes its something super important and sometimes its just a catalogue but you can’t sign for it if you aren’t Home.
So you have to attend church, that is a black and white Bible fact.
Seek first the Kingdom of Heaven. When I was a kid we listened to the radio more than anything else. CD’s weren't around and I didn’t have many cassettes. The thing about the radio that was bothersome was if you turned the dial and were just a smidge off the station you got a static interference that kinda ruined the experience.
When you miss church especially out of selfish reasons you are just a hair off station from God and your week will be filled with noise.
Go enough weeks without it and just like the dial on the old FM radio you will start to pick up other stations and muddy the content you wanted to hear.
Follow the Leader
Just attending isn't the end of it though. Just because a body is present doesn't mean its functioning. Look at Stephen Hawking for example. His head works beyond amazing but his body is "just there". Christ is the head of our body but some of us are unmoving.
I attend Lifepoint here in Lebanon as most of you know. I am dedicated to my church more than I have ever been to any church.
The reason for this dedication is our Leadership and our vision.
I know what Lifepoint stands for, I’ve talked to the pastor and a few leaders in the church I know they have God’s plan for our church and our community in mind and I will follow them.
Christ is the head of the church (His body) and our leaders are nervous system of that body. They receive the vision from the head and they tell the body to move. As part of that body in order to be effective I HAVE to move with them.
Leaders aren’t perfect mind you no one is. Especially some of the greatest
Bible heroes. They were flawed in some way. Just read about the David, Samson, Peter, or Paul and see the ways they failed and how they still managed great things for the Glory of God.
If a leader in a modern church did what David did how would we treat them? How have we treated them? Look at the fall of some prominent preachers and see.
Failure doesn’t always make you a hypocrite sometimes it just makes you human.
Moses lead the Israelites out of Egypt, they wandered, and wandered. However Moses knew the vision God had given him and the promises he was made and he eventually saw that vision realized.
Our leaders might lose their way from time to time but as long as they are seeking God we will find our way.
They must be supported by the people. As the congregation we are not the checks and balance system for the church. We do not admonish or correct our leaders in the church. There is a system set up for that. We support out leaders. We support them when they are doing a great job and we support them harder when they are not.
That is one huge reason people leave churches. When members of the congregation take it upon themselves to "police" and second guess their leaders.
We support them when we can “Amen” something they said and we support them when they step on our toes.
You may not always agree with them but you didn’t always agree with your parents decisions either when you were under their leadership.
Visions are often long term and our leaders know more about situations than we do. They have to sos we have to follow or get out of the way.
The Bible tells us to support in spirit and deed.
Hebrews 13:17 says “Have confidence in your leaders and submit to their authority, because they keep watch over you as those who must give an account. Do this so that their work will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be of no benefit to you.”
1 Tm 5:17
Let the elders who rule well be considered worthy of double honor, especially those who labor in preaching and teaching
1 Ths 5:12-13
We ask you, brothers, to respect those who labor among you and are over you in the Lord and admonish you, and to esteem them very highly in love because of their work. Be at peace among yourselves
We at Lifepoint are lucky we have leaders that fall under 1 Peter 5:3 “Not domineering over those in your charge, but being examples to the flock.”
Our leaders live lives that we can look to as example. Whether it is conquering addiction thru Christ, having strong marriages or having a heart that constantly sings to God.
I Said All That to Say This
Serve, serve and serve.
Even if it’s something simple, greeting, taking out the trash, handing out bulletins it takes a little pressure off the leaders who have way bigger things on their mind.
For every thing you see the leadership team or paid staff do there are dozens you don’t see.
There are pressures and responsibilities that you and I couldn’t handle or we would have been called ourself.
If you are not in one already, find a church that believes the black and white of the Bible. A church where the leaders have a vision and are actively trying to achieve it.
Not where they are just content to have the same faces there every week.
Join the vision and become part of the process.
Thanks for reading